In a state of personal evaluation

Posted: August 23, 2009 in Emotions, evaluation, Randoms

[I don’t expect him to understand. I don’t expect you either or anyone else who reads this to. It’s confusing, I know, I don’t mind and I don’t care! I just needed to blab it out somewhere… ]

… I discovered a fragile layer of me that is so sensitive, so insecure and so unstable. A layer that errupted out of no where. One which rises abruptly at weird times, to get me overanalyzing issues and squeezing my brain with the overthinking I do, then vanishes! Poof! I’m back to the confident, outgoing me. 

It’s annoying! Once overtaken by this layer of me I tend to act so.. umm.. nostalgic mayb? So innocent and shallow that I start revising every word I said and every action I did trying to figure out what went wrong, if anything at all! That wall of strength around me could crumble away upon such tiny things so easily. Discombobulated? probably…

 It’s weird, so damn weird. I’m not usually that type of person. I know how to have fun and live my life to the fullest! It’s just that these tiny bits of what might be insecurity unveil themselves at times… I dunno.

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