There are times when you pause. You stop. You need a moment to grasp what’s really going on. A moment of understanding. It’s your moment of realization…

It’s been like a fast-forwarded chain of events. Feels like you’ve been running for so long. Events are crowding up all around you, and you need to spare yourself the resulting confusion. So you stop to clear everything up, to take your breath. Only then you can find the reasons you lack. Or simply come up with ones to back up these events.

And these reasonings, not only lessens the tension of the conflicted thoughts in your mind as the image becomes clearer, it also pushes you forward to an advanced level of thinking. And advanced level of acceptance. Realization.

Just like everything else, these realizations aren’t always happy and entertaining. No, there’s the other side to it. They could be dull and saddening. They could be the explosion of an endless series of  questioned analysis. Whatever it was, you end up with something that sounds so solid, so significant to you that strucks you, wakes you up, and opens other doors to a more open-minded you.

Today, I stop. I take a rest. I give myself the time to absorb my moments, to realize. To comprehend…

I took a moment to look at Mum, to the closest friend of mine she’s always been. She isn’t overprotective. She’s only being herself- My mother. I, like everyone of you, when it comes to speaking of our mothers, we can’t find the right words to lay down. They’re just the best. In everying. I’m sorry I’ve been such a pain sometimes xD

Then comes Mr. Awesomeness, My one and only brother. And these two, Mum and Bro, make my very precious, very small, family. My very sacred bubble of trust…

I move on as I enjoy staring at this paused filmstrip of my life. Next comes my circle of friends. An enormous one. I smile as I realize the beauty of it.

I soon understand that this isn’t the real one. My real circle of friends is small. Really small that only a few of these too many people have managed to earn an exchanged trust that made them go in so quickly. I have realized that I’ve rushed a lot of things. I’ve allowed others who didn’t deserve it to enter. I’ve taken jerks as bestfriends. I’ve trusted liers with my secrets. I was too kind to some that they’ve taken my kindness as weakness. I was so truthful with some that they’ve misunderstood that as me being shallow or naive. I wasn’t. I was only myself. And they didn’t deserve my company. This was the realization that made me understand they had to be kicked out. And quickly!

I don’t necessary have to cross them out of my life, but from now on, not anyone can make it to my world. I can sure keep those who are worth it close. But not closer.

I do feel left out. But I get over it…

My smile grows even wider, as I move on to another understanding. Another realization. Never feel sorry over losing something you’ve loved with all your heart, for definitely you shall be granted something far more beautiful. Something you deserve, for you deserve something better. I keep on saying this, everything happens for a reason! We might not get it now. Maybe sometime later. I’ve realized that some people live their lives searching desperately for love. They meet the wrong person, and let their love go to waste. Others are lucky enough to reunite with their soulmates forever. Some others might meet the right person, but for some reason they’re separated! Maybe it’s because he/she was never that so-called “right person”!!

I’ve realized that we shouldn’t run after things beyond our reach. What’s meant to be shall struck us in the wierdest ways possible! It’s all about patience. And when it comes to love, destiny shall introduce you to your significant other. 😀 Someday. Someday shall be your day…

Seems like this filmstrip is endless. There are way too much realizations to be listed in one post. And as I stare at infinity, I understand that some of these realizations, if not most of them, I’ve already realized them a long time before!! Maybe I was just not ready to say them out loud. Maybe I was too blind to see… Maybe I’m just to happy to let the overthinking begin. Maybe… Maybe I’m afraid of the complications these realizations bring.

But guess what? These realizations are quite worth it. Quite worth the thought. And the more you go through stuff, the more you’re going to realize, the more you’re  going to enjoy the memories it brings…

These were my moments of realization. What about you?  Are you ready to step up for yourself? Is it just about time to give it a shot and understand the life you’ve been living? Give it a shot. Open your eyes. And never,never let anything put you down! I’ve witnessed mine, and I know there are a lot more to find out. And I hope, I really do, this would help you stumble upon yours…

I feel warm. Happy. I love life. I love God.

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Comments
  1. Great idea, but will this work over the long run?

  2. Tja, das Leben kann so scheisse sein, mann muss sich nur muhe geben.

  3. Rana says:

    @ Roulette Tricks, yeah I suppose 😀 It would do you no harm to actually understand the life you’ve been living or maybe try to find reasons behind the too many weird stuff we come across everyday. It would make a difference to know who does deserve your company and who doesn’t. Just give it a shot 😉

    @ Internet roulette, I don’t really understand wot you’re saying…

  4. I cannot believe this is true!

  5. Rana says:

    Why? And wot exactly don’t you believe ? 🙂
    3 roulettes in a row lol

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