Archive for the ‘delights’ Category

Lub Dub

Posted: June 22, 2013 in delights, Drawings, Life, Love, Randoms
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Lub Dub. 
Lub Dub.

Make it beat.

Lub Dub.

Blow your life into mine. Breathe the air that rushes within; fill a collapsing lung, soothe the ache that eats it away.
Make it beat.

Lub Dub.
Lub Dub.

Do you hear? A fragile beat?
Lub Dub.
Do you feel? A pulse, so weak?

Water the well that ran dry. Purge life then squeeze it out…
How does it taste… To feel?

Lub Dub.

Tap it; into it. Do you see? A sign of life within me? Fetch the relics prone to feel; make them beat.
Make it beat.

Tap it; into it, rupture the seal. Hold it, then behold it, embrace shatters into whole. Nourish it.
Make it beat.

Lub Dub.
Lub Dub.

Speech of the speechless, it speaks.
Of the feelings it owes the soul that made it feel.

Lub Dub.

It beats.

Stare; into and through me.

Stare, as your eyes outline my existence.

Recollect pieces of a scattered me, as you trace the edges of myself into a premises that only your chasing eyes define.

Draw me out of myself and into you, as I fall…

From the deepest pits of my nothingness, into the deepest pits of yourself.

Embrace, a restless me to the rest of your arms.

Fill me in, as you fill the spaces between my fingers.

Listen,

As two heartbeats synchronize into one.

Stare,

As I stare…

Into where I belong.

And do I not speak of what I feel?

For words gone trivial,

Upon the intensity inside.

Steal a glimpse.
Follow the eyes where they lead.
Pause,
Appreciate the silence…
That syncs two heartbeats together, that amplifies a trembling breath,
a sigh,
that escapes,
and diffuses into warmth.
Crawl aside, and within.
Trace, the outlines of her existence,
Slide upon sweaty palms,
Up to the edges of her face,
Watch her cheeks round up,
Blush,
in a faint demure…
As fingers roll over,
Tracing down her chin
And Up the lips
That presses letters of your name
Somewhere, sometime, in Birmingham, UK.

Somewhere, sometime, in Birmingham, UK.

Night bids the sun farewell. From wild orange to decent purple the sky flickers until it settles under a blanket of elegant black. Stars burn out, dissolved into the void above myself. And I stare into the infinite nothingness until the lights dazzle my sight; the pavements adorned with the demure brightness of the street lamps.

A decent rush of cold air welcomes me on board. Tonight, it’s only these streets and myself…
A memory, ignited as the same streets pave their way into the alleys of my remembrance. And I recall myself walking down the same streets, breathing the same chilling air, listening to the same outrageous music of these streets fade into midnight, as they empty from all people and traffic…
I recall, an existence walking by my side, now gone. I recall, a heart enjoying the epitome of vibrant emotions, now empty. A few more steps down my way, and I recall, a soul ecstatic and alive, now barely living.
I walk, the streets are soothing. It’s quiet, they listen… To every memory that bounces upon every ignorant footstep…
l drift, and they drift along.
The night stretches, so does the streets. And endless, my walk becomes.
It’s the same people, walking down the same streets, yet their hearts exchanged for something rather different; less genuine, more detached- emptier.
I walk. I recall and recall, and the streets soothe the ache.
The night eats the passion away.
The memory escapes.
An unleashed spirit that leaves; vaporized into thin air, leaving a mist of sweet reminisce on my mind, and body.
Tonight, I’ve laid a memory to rest.

Am I allowed a moment; just one moment, of weakness? Am I allowed to give my cheeks a break, stop smiling and let my lips curl into a desperate puppy face?
Am I allowed to feel tired; dead tired, if not exhausted? For I am, really.

Am I allowed…?

To run to you, to crash, to talk, to embrace my worries by your thoughts? Am I allowed to let my usually boosting energies escape me? Then fall by your side; sit down, barely alive?

Am I allowed… ?
To wish, to crave, to long for and cherish your subtle existence?

So,
Do you mind if you grant me the right to?

Do you mind…?
Being there? For a little longer than just a moment? For quite longer than a mere chit-chat? Do you mind, if I stumble upon you? If I slip into the cozy pits of your mind? If I wander, together with your thoughts?

Am I allowed, to ask, do you mind?

A long break this has been. A good one. One I was desperately in need of. I escaped. There has been a life I quit, people I ran away; to and from, a whole world I chose to leave behind. I thought it would help me keep my mind off everything, but no. Quite the contrary, it gave way to thinking, which I eventually realized I need quite as much.

The outcome was: change. Sheer change. Blunt and bold. Drastic. I needed such solitude for such amendments to take place. And it did. And still is.

Now my break comes to an end. So does the world I have created for my own during what I could possibly refer to as: spiritual rehab. I am reintroducing myself, once more, into this life. I am reintegrating myself, or rather, the newer version of myself.

Change is good. It feels better, stronger, and if possible, much much more certain and mature. Throughout this time, I’ve found peace. my thoughts ripened.

Change. It’s not over. And that’s the challenge now; to maintain the outcome of a rough time.

Putting up my genuine 15 inch smile, I start over.

My heavenly mess

Beautiful morning this has been. Bright, peaceful and quiet. Home has never been so inviting, so fresh with sunlight. So warm. I renewed my love to the couch for an hour or so, reading. Nothing is better than a good morning and a book to keep oneself in good company.

But I needed more, more than just a book. There was a tension that only painting could ease. Colours, yes! The smell of oil was so pungent, yet so soothing. Sedating. Once again, I parted with this world into my own.